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"Romantic Things to Do to Keep Your
Relationship Vibrant,
Alive and Exciting"
by Susie and Otto Collins
It's often been said that it's the little
things in life that make
all the difference.
No where is this truer than when it comes to
keeping your
relationship alive, growing and vibrant.
Romance can be one of those things that keeps
a
relationship fresh and exciting.
We all have different ideas of what "romance"
and "being
romantic" means. There can be a lot of unmet
expectations,
frustrations and feelings of failure around
this idea.
We don't think it has to be this way.
What being romantic means to us is that we
are continuously
discovering ways to laugh, love and connect
with each other
and deepen our intimacy all the time.
To us, romance is what we do on a
moment-by-moment and
day-by-day basis to make our relationship
stronger and more
passionate. Being romantic is a way of
showing our deep love
for each other.
Of all the romantic things to do, we've found
that the small
things make the biggest difference. Here's
an example of
what happened the other night...
Susie went camping for one night with her
extended family
and since Otto doesn't like "roughing" it, he
stayed home.
As she snuggled down in her tent with her
sister, Susie
called Otto on her cell phone to say
goodnight. She told
him that she loved him and missed him.
Although a phone call is a pretty normal
thing to do
between people who truly care about one
another when
they are apart, it can be a way to connect
and rekindle
love in a romantic way like we did.
Romantic things to do for each other are
romantic only when
they create the desired effect within the
other person and
within the relationship. Romance will only
create the desired
effect when it is not done out of obligation
or because it is
expected.
So what are the best romantic things to do to
make your
relationship more alive?
That depends on you and your partner because
everyone
is different. Romance is certainly in the eye
of the beholder!
To some people, a "no-brainer" romantic thing
to do is to
send flowers. You can't go wrong with
flowers, right?
Wrong.
You can go wrong with flowers if there is
little or no "heart"
in the gesture and if there's something else
that the other
person is wanting.
Susie's ex-husband often brought her flowers
during their
30-year marriage. Although it truly was a
wonderful gesture,
what she really wanted more was to connect on
a deeper
level with him.
With that being said, here are some ideas
around the
notion of romance and being romantic...
1. Pay attention to what your partner likes.
If he/she likes
surprises, surprise him/her. If not,
don't--even if you like
surprises. Pay attention to your partner's
favorite things
that they seldom indulge themselves in and
then do those
things. It might be something your partner
wouldn't buy
or do for themselves like buy a cd of their
favorite music.
2. A romantic gesture can be doing a very
small thing.
It might be after the kids are in bed,
getting a bowl of ice
cream and two spoons--then sharing it. It
might be putting
the kids to bed without being asked. It might
be a hug or
a foot rub. For Susie, a romantic gesture is
when Otto
lovingly puts his hand on the back of her
neck.
3. Romance can be taking a trip down memory
lane.
Visit where you went on your first date or
some other place
that holds significance for the two of you.
It's very romantic
for the two of us to visit the natural
setting where we went
on our first date and where we got married.
4. We've heard people say that they are not
romantic.
If you've never considered yourself to be
romantic and
never really wanted to be but your partner
would like
more "romance," you can begin by changing
your thinking.
Instead of thinking that romance is something
artificial
and outside yourself that you "do," you can
begin thinking
that romance is merely ways of expressing
your love that
your partner will receive and enjoy.
5. What if you want more romance and your
partner
doesn't seem to? Be more romantic and loving
yourself
in the way that your partner wants to be
loved. Start
with little ways and just see what happens.
Romance and being romantic are the things you
do that
bring you closer together and keep the spark
alive.
Being romantic and finding romantic things to
do is
something that you or anyone can do. You just
have to
open to more possibilities, have the desire
create
special times with your partner or spouse and
allow
the ideas to flow from love.
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Relationship coaches Susie and Otto
Collins, authors
of "Should You Stay or Should You Go?" and "No More
Jealousy" are experts at helping people get more of the
love they really want. Learn the 5 keys to a closer, more
loving relationship, click below for your free 5-part mini-course:
http://www.Collinspartners.com |